The Hummingbird Address

From the steps of her palace in Hummingbird sim, Tiessa walks up to the podium to give her, soon to be famous, Hummingbird Address. This speech comes at a time of great strife in Second Life and she wishes to communicate her feelings about the condition of Second Life and her candidacy for Governorship of Second Life.

"Four score and sixteen months ago Phil brought forth on this net, the Linden Labs, conceived in Liberty, and dedicated to the proposition that all avatars are created equal."

"Now we are afflicted by a great system outage, testing whether Second Life, or any Life so programmed and so untested, can long remain up. We are met on a sim impacted by that outage. We have come to dedicate a portion of that sim, as a final resting place for those avatars who here were disconnected that Second Life might remain up. It is altogether fitting and proper that we should do this."

"But, in a larger sense, we can not dedicate -- we can not consecrate -- we can not hallow -- this sim. The brave avatars, connected and disconnected, who lived here, have consecrated it, far above our poor power to add or detract. The Grid will little note, nor long remember what we say here, but it can never forget what bugs occurred here. It is for us the connected, rather, to be dedicated here to the unfinished work which they who were disconnected here have thus far so nobly advanced. It is rather for us to be here dedicated to the great task remaining before us -- that from these honored avatars we take increased devotion to that cause for which they gave the last full measure of connectivity -- that we here highly resolve that these avatars shall not have disconnected in vain -- that this Grid, under Tiessa, shall have a new birth of freedom -- and that government of the avatars, by the avatars, for the avatars, shall not perish from the Internet."

Looking solemn and aggrieved, she bows her head in reverence for the departed of Second Life, turns, and walks back to her palace, turning at the last moment before entering to whisper, "Apologies to the President."

Tiessa's Campaign For Governor

Tiessa, dressed smartly and primly in a severe business suit, steps up to the podium. She smiles sweetly to everyone in attendance and launches into her speech without formality or preamble.

"Friends, Lindens, avatars, lend me your IMs;
I come to skewer Phil, not to praise him.
The bugs that SL inflicts affect us all;
The fixes are oft broken in the updates;
So let it be with Phil. The noble media
Hath told you Phil was ambitious:
If it were so, it was a grievous fault,
And grievously hath Phil answer'd it."

"SL was my friend, faithful and shopping friendly:
But Phil was ambitious;
Having brought lag and bugs to us all.
He hath captivated many with Second Life
Whose wallets did the business' coffers fill:
Did this in Phil seem ambitious?
When that the avatars have cried, Phil hath wept:
Second Life will scale, just one more update will fix it!"

"You all did see that in the Town Hall
We presented him a grievous list,
Which Lindens dodged and spun the news?
Was this ambition bringing all to ruin?"

"I speak not to disprove what the Lindens spoke,
But here I am to speak what I know.
You all did love SL once, not without cause:
What cause withholds you then, to throw out Phil?
O judgment! thou are fled to bad coding practices,
And programmers have lost their reason. Bear with me;
My password is mangled in the database with Phil's,
And I cannot log in until it is reset for me."

"When I do log in, I pledge to you;
Fair avatars and furries all:
My governorship will be beneficent,
The lag and bugs will disappear,
Lindens once again shall fill all hands,
And snoops and puritans shall not peer in
On anything consenting adults will do.
But not while Phil rules the grid."

Tiessa again smiles sweetly to all assembled and leaves the podium, turning at the last moment to whisper, "My apologies to The Bard."

If you are wondering what all this is about, read Vint's or Veyron's blog entries. This was inspired by reading Zoe's speech :)