Thursday, January 3, 2008

It's The Year Of The Bimbo And The Gay Nazi Robot Furries Are Yiffing

Lillie IMed me the other day and said she was going to dub 2008 the 'Year of the Bimbo' because it had an hour-glass figure built right in. I don't remember a bimbo on my Chinese restaurant table setting. She wrote her list of ins and outs for 2008 in the Looking Glass magazine blog. Here are some highlights:

Out: Blow jobs
In: Roleplay sex scenes

I bet the guys will be disappointed to find that blow jobs are out, dressing up in a skimpy French maids outfit may distract them for a while, but I think they'll still want blow jobs.

Out: Hoes
In: Bimbos

I don't want to know what sordid uses gardening implements have been used for, but I'm happy to hear that bimbos will be in good favor this year.

Out: Big Ugly Boots
In: Prim Shoes from Shiny Things

Were 'Big Ugly Boots' ever good things?

Out: Cheap prim skirts
In: Couture influenced pants

You want to dress your bimbos in pants?

Out: Barbies
In: Boobs
Out: Barbies
In: Upscale

Bimbo's are in, but you exclude our exemplar? Sacrilege! Melissa will be happy to hear that boobs are in, though.

Out: AOs with Model poses
In: MOCAP dances
Out: Sinwave
In: Zhao
Out: Hug attachments
In: Rendez-Vous

MOCAP? Zhao (as in the open source AO)? Rendez-Vous? Huh? Speak English slowly, I'm blond.

Out: Partnering
In: Collaring

Yay!

Out: Men as women escorts
In: Men as women characters in roleplay

Either way, they should walk a mile in our heels sometimes.

Out: Orgy Rooms
In: Bondage Rooms

Both, please :)

Out: Cheap Sex Beds
In: SexGen Diamond

Diamond! Does it have more than my platinum? BTW, did they ever fix those annoying chains and use one of the Lock* varieties?

Out: Threesomes
In: Four way

Will it be 5-way next year?

Out: Blingy Shoes
In: Armidi Boots

Awww, but bling is so cheesy it's fun.

Out: Nazi Fur
In: Gay yiffing

Early last year, I saw a group in the group-list that was something like, 'Vampire Gorean Furries' and I thought that was a pretty precise kink. "Unless I'm a platinum blond fox (literally) Free Woman running for my life in a raid on my city from a bunch of blood-sucking undead domineering slave owners in pink bunny outfits who want to dress me in silks, I just can't get off." How often does that happen? Once a century? Which in Second Life time is like every 10 minutes...

Maybe it could be gay Nazi robot furries yiffing or something like that.

Which makes one of the earlier bits of Lillie's list more obvious:
Out: Cheap SL Sex
In: Long Roleplay

With setups like these, you are going to need long sessions. "Okay honey, now that I'm tied up by my toes with a latex surgeon's mask and a steel wool bikini on and you are dressed up like Cary Grant from 'Some Like It Hot' wearing silver-spurred cowboy boots and a lizard's tail and Elvis is singing 'Blue Suede Shoes' we can begin. God am I so hot and turned on right now. Oh, don't forget to put the peanut butter covered soft-boiled egg on the chair over there for later. I said the chair not the conveyor belt! The chair and the egg come after the conveyor belt. Can't you get anything right? You just ruined the entire mood for me, I'm no longer turned on, we'll just have to start all over again. And this time, try to get it right."

Yeah, this year is going to be fun. I'm off to install the conveyor belt.

1 comment:

Becky said...

Keep up the good work.