Monday, March 31, 2008

The True Impact Of Griefers

Melissa points out an article about griefers and the true harm they can do.

Internet griefers descended on an epilepsy support message board last weekend and used JavaScript code and flashing computer animation to trigger migraine headaches and seizures in some users.

Griefers are immature scum who have no empathy for others. That is the real problem.

I'm In The New AlienHearts Music Video

AlienHearts invited me to be in their newest music video and it's finally out. Being a long time fan of their music, I jumped at the chance to be in it. Like all movie/video shoots, it was mostly standing around and waiting, interspersed with a few moments of making certain I didn't talk or move my avatar in an inappropriate way. All for a few seconds of footage of me being in the music video. But it was worth every moment of it, since the AlienHearts DJs are great to hang out with, and helping out in their project was definitely a blast.

I'm the blond playing the violin with a close-up of me around 5 minutes into the video.

Helena's Moved Her Blog To Blogger

Helena Kirkorian has moved her Paradise Lost blog to Blogger. Maybe she'll update it more than her MySpace one. Go over there, subscribe, and make a comment so she knows we want to hear more from her.

Helena Kirkorian (ParadiseLost background preview)Helena, for those of you who don't know, is the Madame of Paradise Lost, a wonderful club that has fallen mostly silent due to her absence. I've written about her and Paradise Lost before and she'll feature in my next chapter as well. She's one of the nicest people I've ever met in SecondLife and her on-going preoccupation with RealLife is annoying.

Friday, March 28, 2008

Attachment Locking Script (RestrainedLife Compatible) v1.0

A number of people who bought my RestrainedLife Amethyst Collar Plug-in have asked me if it can lock other attachments as well. I've had to tell them that the RL Viewer does not allow an object to lock another attachment, an object has to lock itself. To solve this problem, I've just released a script that you can put into any attachment to lock it.

Here is the help document:

Did you ever want to lock your sub's other attachments besides their collar? Now you can, with this script. Just put this into any attachment and when you click the attachment, you will be given the option to lock it.

While locked, if the sub removes the attachment, you will be notified immediately via IM that it occurred. If the sub uses the RestrainedLife viewer, they will be unable to remove the attachment at all.

To unlock the attachment, when you click the object, you will be given the opportunity to unlock it.

Five copies of the script come in this pack.

Leaping Dolphin Boutique
You can visit the in-world Leaping Dolphin Boutique store, or purchase my products at SLExchange or Onrez.

Wednesday, March 26, 2008

I Sense A Disturbance In The Pink Side Of The Force

As if a million bimbos cried out "Duh?!" and then were silent...

A strange thing has been happening over the past day to my blog traffic. Normally, I receive 1-2 search results a day for "make me a bimbo" or "how to be a bimbo", since I'm #1 and #2 respectively for those search results on Google.

In the past day, those traffic numbers have spiked dramatically, and I've received 51 unique visitors in about 24 hours for "how to be a bimbo" and 12 unique visitors for "make me a bimbo". My Make Me A Bimbo post briefly passed my homepage on the number of hits it received. I can't explain why there arose this sudden interest in acting like a bimbo.

Even though I am a bimbo, all of my posts about the "make me a bimbo" phenomena are merely pointing out that I'm highly ranked on Google for that phrase. But then again, these are bimbo wannabes searching for the information.

To all of the wannabe bimbos out there who are discovering my blog for the first time, welcome! I think I'll have to turn up the bimbo quotient here for a while to satisfy the growing need for bimbo related material. In the mean time, check out the Mistress Strangelove series for reading, hopefully my ditziness will rub off on you. For the love of god, avoid the first post in the "bimbo's guide" series on LSL scripting, it'll make your fluffy pink head hurt - it makes mine hurt and I wrote it.

Or maybe this is a result of the launch of my "inTiessa" brand...

The Tiessa Brand

Following the example of Linden Lab and Zoe, I've decided to brand myself. I've whipped up a logo based on Linden Lab's new brand, but I think it may send the wrong message....

I don't mind other's using my logo as they see fit, I'm pretty easy... I mean easy going.

Your Abuse Report Has Been Added To The Queue

A number of bloggers are talking about the new Linden Lab policies regarding logos, naming, use of trademarks, etc.

My simple reply to Linden Labs is, "Your Abuse Report has been added to the queue, I am currently dealing with lots of copyright infringement cases that have currently gone unhandled by Linden Labs, when those are resolved, I will be able to handle your request."

Preferrably, I'd like to see Phil do one of the naked ads protesting copyright infringement...

Tuesday, March 25, 2008

RestrainedLife Amethyst Collar Plugin v1.0

Recently, I've been trying my hand at selling things in SecondLife. One thing I just finished is a plugin for Amethyst collars that provides access to the full range of RestrainedLife viewer features. I'm calling my "brand", Leaping Dolphin Boutique.

You can visit the in-world Leaping Dolphin Boutique store, or purchase my products at SLExchange or Onrez. Not only do I make this plugin, but I also have lots of graffiti textures for urban building projects along with a few home furnishings.

My plugin provides a more complete, and I'd like to think, intuitive, interface to the features available from the modified client. What follows is the help document, listing all of the features.

Welcome to Leaping Dolphin Boutique's RestrainedLife Viewer plugin for the Amethyst collar. This plugin provides owners of a sub with an Amethyst collar access to the full range of functionality provided by the RestrainedLife Viewer. No other RestrainedLife plugin provides the comprehensive access to the functionality provided by the viewer, now the owner can take off clothing and attachments, lock outfits, force sitting on an object, prevent standing, lock channel communications, full teleport control, and more.

And all owners will be notified if the sub ever logs in without the RestrainedLife client - never again wonder if they've found a way to circumvent the restrictions.

Just install this plugin into their collar and know they are securely under your total control.

The RestrainedLife Viewer is a modified version of the SecondLife client software that provides a wide range of functionality for enhancing the bondage experience. It is available for download and the developer, Marine, has a blog covering the RestrainedLife viewer enhancements.


RestrainedLife Client Detection

This plugin will determine if the collar wearer logs in with the RestrainedLife viewer or not. If the collar wearer logs in with another client, all of their owners will be notified via IM.


These commands are activated in the same manner as all other commands, with a prefix of "." or whatever it has been changed to.

A few quick notes about the commands and their arguments. All commands are available to an unowned sub or to the primary and secondary owners unless otherwise specified. Avatar names and object names must be exact matches. Lists of locations are comma separated lists of the names with no spaces around the commas. Lists of channels are command separated lists of the channels with no spaces around the commas.

General Commands
.lock : Prevent the sub from removing the collar.
.unlock : Allow the sub to remove the collar.
.clear : Clear all restrictions.
.status : Print a summary of all active restrictions.

Stand/Sit Commands
.nostand : Prevent the sub from using the "Stand Up" button.
.maystand : Allow the sub to use the "Stand Up" button.
.sit <object name> : Forces sub to sit on the named nearby object (this can be sometimes flakey in the RestrainedLife viewer.)

Teleport Commands
.notp : Prevent the sub from teleporting.
.maytp : Allow the sub to teleport.

Object/Inventory Commands
.noedit : Prevent the sub from editing objects.
.mayedit : Allow the sub to edit objects.
.norez : Prevent the sub from creating or rezzing objects from inventory.
.mayrez : Allow the sub to rez create or objects from inventory.
.noinv : Prevent the sub from viewing their inventory window, closes it, if it is open.
.mayinv : Allow the sub to view their inventory window.
.nonote : Prevent the sub from viewing notecards.
.maynote : Allow the sub to view notecards.

Outfit/Attachment Commands
.listattach : Print a list of the parts of the body the sub has objects attached to.
.listoutfit : Print a list of clothing parts the sub is wearing.
.lockoutfit : Prevent the sub from adding or removing any clothing.
.unlockoutfit : Allow the sub to add and remove clothing.
.naked : Remove all clothing and attachments from the sub, except locked ones.
.takeoff all : Remove all clothing from the sub.
.takeoff <locations> : Remove the clothing from the specific locations.
.detach all : Remove all attachments from the sub, except locked ones.
.detach <locations> : Remove all attachments from the specific locations.

outfit locations: gloves,jacket,pants,shirt,shoes,skirt,socks,underpants,undershirt,skin

attachment locations: chest,skull,left shoulder,right shoulder,left hand,right hand,left foot,right foot,spine,pelvis,mouth,chin,left ear,right ear,left eyeball,right eyeball,nose,r upper arm,r forearm,l upper arm,l forearm,right hip,r upper leg,r lower leg,left hip,l upper leg,l lower leg,stomach,left pec,right pec,center 2,top right,top,top left,center,bottom left,bottom,bottom right

Chat/IM Mute Commands
These features allow the owner to control whether the sub can chat or IM and whether they can receive chat or IM.
.mute : Prevent all chat and IM except for IMs to owner.
.unmute : Enables chat and IMs.

.deafen : Prevent all chat and IMs from reaching the sub, except the owners'.
.undeafen : Unblock chat and IMs from reaching the sub.

.lockchannels : Prevent sending chat on any non-public channel (e.g. /6 hello)
.lockchannels <channels> : If channels are currently not blocked, block them.
.unlockchannels : Allow sending chat on non-public channels.
.unlockchannels <channels> : If non-public chat is blocked, unblock it for the specified channels.

"Advanced" Commands

The following set of functions are for more precise control of the various features of the RestrainedLife viewier.

Advanced Teleport Commands
.notp owners : If the sub is already prevented from teleporting, block teleport offers from owners.
.notp <avatar name> : If the avatar is an exception to teleport blocking, block them.
.notp-lm : Prevent the sub from teleporting to landmarks.
.notp-loc : Prevent the sub from teleporting to map locations.
.notp-sit : Prevent the sub from teleporting via sitting.
.notp-lure : Prevent the sub from teleporting via offers.
.notp-lure owners : If the sub cannot teleport, prevent the subs owners from teleporting them.
.notp-lure <avatar name> : If the avatar is permitted to teleport the sub, block them.
.maytp owners : If the owners are currently blocked from offer teleports, unblock them.
.maytp <avatar name> : Allows the sub to receive teleport offers from the avatar.
.maytp-lm : Allow the sub to teleport to landmarks.
.maytp-loc : Allow the sub to teleport to map locations.
.maytp-sit : Allow the sub to teleport via sitting.
.maytp-lure : Allow the sub to teleport via offers.
.maytp-lure owners : If teleports from owners are blocked, unblock them.
.maytp-lure <avatar name> : If teleports from the avatar are blocked, unblock them.

Advanced Clothing/Attachment Commands
.nowear all : Prevent adding clothing to any clothing location.
.nowear <locations> : Prevent adding clothing to the specific locations.
.maywear all : Allow adding clothing to any clothing location.
.maywear <locations> : Allow adding clothing to the specific locations.
.noremove all : Prevent removing clothing any clothing.
.noremove <locations> : Prevent removing clothing from specific locations.
.mayremove all : Allow removing all clothing.
.mayremove <locations> : Allow removing clothing from specific locations.

Advanced Chat/IM Commands
.mute owners : If IMs are already muted, mutes IMs to owners.
.mute <avatar name> : If the avatar is already unmuted, mute them.
.mute-chat : Prevent all chat.
.mute-im : Prevent all IMs, except to owners.
.mute-im owners : If IMs are already muted, mutes IMs to owners.
.mute-im <avatar name> : If the avatar is already unmuted, mute them.
.unmute owners : If IMs to owners are already muted, unmute them.
.unmute <avatar name> : If the avatar is already muted, unmute them.
.unmute-chat : Enable all chat.
.unmute-im : Enable all IMs.
.unmute-im owners : If IMs to owners are already muted, unmute them.
.unmute-im <avatar name> : If the avatar is already muted, unmute them.

.deafen owners : If already deaf, prevent even the owners' from reaching the sub.
.deafen <avatar name> : If chat and IM from an avatar are already unblocked, block it.
.deafen-chat : Prevent all chat from reaching the sub, except the owners'.
.deafen-chat owners : If already deafened, prevent even the owners' from reaching the sub.
.deafen-chat <avatar name> : If chat from an avatar is already unblocked, block it.
.deafen-im : Prevent all IMs from reaching the sub, except the owners'.
.deafen-im owners : If already deafened, prevent even the owners' from reaching the sub.
.deafen-im <avatar name> : If IMs from an avatar is already unblocked, block it.
.undeafen owners : If chat and IMs from the owners are blocked, unblock them.
.undeafen <avatar name> : If chat and IMs from an avatar are blocked, unblock them.
.undeafen-chat : Unblock chat from reaching the sub.
.undeafen-chat owners : If chat from the owners is blocked, unblock it.
.undeafen-chat <avatar name> : If chat from an avatar is blocked, unblock it.
.undeafen-im : Unblock IMs from reaching the sub.
.undeafen-im owners : If IMs from the owners are blocked, unblock them.
.undeafen-im <avatar name> : If IMs from an avatar is blocked, unblock them.

Tuesday, March 18, 2008

Daily Bimbo 4

Like the two bimbos in the following video, I was in the mood to amuse everyone today and tell a couple of blond jokes, unfortunately, like them, I didn't get any of the jokes either and I had to look for someone to explain them to me.

Yes, these two try to tell a bunch of blond jokes, but they keep having to stop and explain them to each other.

It's bad when the subject in the joke is smarter than the teller...
"A blond was going to the airport, saw a sign that said 'airport left', so she turned around and went home. Uh... I don't get it."

Or when the teller thinks the joke makes sense...
"The blond was so stupid she asked for a price check at the dollar store. Uh... I've done that before."

This one is almost transcendent...
"The blond was so stupid she studied for a blood test. Uh... Of course you have to study, otherwise you'll get a needle in your arm."

Friday, March 14, 2008

The Governor Is Dead! Long Live The Governor!

I didn't do it, I swear.

Because you are used to coming to the site for hard-hitting news that is up to date, (hah!), let me tell you that Phil is stepping down as CEO of Linden Labs.

I've complained about the issues in Second Life before and made amusing references to the death of the Governor, but this comes as a surprise to me.

I think one comment sums it up well:

I guess at this point - until I've had more chance to think about the implications - it could be summed up as "Hope for the best, prepare for the worst".

I think there's a pretty good chance that this will light a fire under the asses of those responsible for stability and user retention, but I also think that it's just as likely - if not more so - that it will end up evolving into a Second Life where so-called "non professional" content creators like myself are even less valued in favor of attracting the "big players".

I hope the nice, Libertarian bent of Second Life stays with an emphasis on grass roots growth of content. We saw how the emphasis on big corporations worked out for the Lindens.

This may be the beginning of the big push for a broader appeal like what happened on the Internet during the late 90s. It appears Phil will still be at the center of the "vision" of Linden Labs, which may be what keeps the focus on allowing hobbyists to thrive.

Thursday, March 13, 2008

You Can Call Me Mistress Evil

You are The Devil

Materiality. Material Force. Material temptation; sometimes obsession

The Devil is often a great card for business success; hard work and ambition.

Perhaps the most misunderstood of all the major arcana, the Devil is not really "Satan" at all, but Pan the half-goat nature god and/or Dionysius. These are gods of pleasure and abandon, of wild behavior and unbridled desires. This is a card about ambitions; it is also synonymous with temptation and addiction. On the flip side, however, the card can be a warning to someone who is too restrained, someone who never allows themselves to get passionate or messy or wild - or ambitious. This, too, is a form of enslavement. As a person, the Devil can stand for a man of money or erotic power, aggressive, controlling, or just persuasive. This is not to say a bad man, but certainly a powerful man who is hard to resist. The important thing is to remember that any chain is freely worn. In most cases, you are enslaved only because you allow it.

What Tarot Card are You?
Take the Test to Find Out.

Thank you, Nadine for the interesting link. If this is such a good card for material success, where is all my loot?

Stealing The Rights Of Everyone

Over on Winter Market, Nadine blogs about a merchant who is scamming people out of their rights. This merchant made a few changes to the ZHAO-II animation overrider and has closed up those changes and wants L$10,000 to distribute the source code for them.

For those of you who don't know, the ZHAO is open source with a license that states if you modify it and redistribute it, you must redistribute those modifications so that anyone can access them. This merchant, Hunney Jewell, modified the code a little and is now asking for an outrageous sum of money to release the few, small changes she has made.

I probably was never going to buy anything from her anyway, but I want to make certain that people that read this know her perfidy as well and have the opportunity to make up their own minds as to the sort of merchant she is.

Unlike the content theft that is going around, which steals the works of one person and is bad enough, this steals the rights of everyone.

Tuesday, March 11, 2008

I Come To Bury Caesar

Linden Labs is inviting all of their Concierge customers to a big "Ides of March" toga party, ostensibly for "Instead of celebrating the Ides of March by killing Caesar, come and hang out with the Concierge team and other concierge customers."

I don't think they read my campaign speech for governor where I reworked, Shakespeare's famous Julius Caesar speech, otherwise they wouldn't let me near Phil with a dagger hidden in my toga.

Friends, Lindens, avatars, lend me your IMs;
I come to skewer Phil, not to praise him.
The bugs that SL inflicts affect us all;
The fixes are oft broken in the updates;
So let it be with Phil. The noble media
Hath told you Phil was ambitious:
If it were so, it was a grievous fault,
And grievously hath Phil answer'd it.


When I do log in, I pledge to you;
Fair avatars and furries all:
My governorship will be beneficent,
The lag and bugs will disappear,
Lindens once again shall fill all hands,
And snoops and puritans shall not peer in
On anything consenting adults will do.
But not while Phil rules the grid.

Monday, March 10, 2008

I Know Veyron Is A Super Flirt

Veyron doesn't think she's a Super Flirt, I happen to disagree. She flirts all the time, it's just generally low-key and mixed with her wicked sense of humor.

I took the same test and I achieved the same result. Now, I know I flirt all the time and the rest of the world is just going to have to deal with it.

In looking at the rest of that site, it looks dangerous, way too many polls to take with amusing titles. However, I already know the answer to one of them, "What Kind Of Breakfast Are You?". Okay, I know the type of breakfast, I want to be. I want to be the type of breakfast that is eaten every morning.

Oh, and in response to Vey's assertion that I get away with things based on my boobs, I do not get away with things because of them. Well, much... Well, often... Well, maybe not big things... Okay, how about we compromise and say, I don't often get away with homicide because of them.

Thursday, March 6, 2008

Mistress Strangelove: Chapter 8 : 'With Bells On' In Real Life

Mistress Strangelove or : How I Learned To Stop Worrying And Love My Kinks

The (Mis)Adventures Of A Reluctant Mistress

Chapter 1 : A Shopping Addict Is Born
Chapter 2 : My Inner Bimbo
Chapter 3 : If The Nuns From My Catholic Grade School Only Knew
Chapter 4 : With Bells On
Chapter 5 : Would You Dance With Me?
Chapter 6 : Its Harder Than Walking And Chewing Gum
Chapter 7 : One Woman's Porn Is Another Woman's Research
Chapter 8 : 'With Bells On' In Real Life

Having resolved to use more dirty talk in Real Life sex to see how it improved my sex life, I set about practicing it in Second Life. Over the next couple of weeks, I had some more cybersex experiences where I continued to experiment and see what worked and what didn't. By holding post-coital critique sessions of my cybersex techniques, I must have frustrated numerous guys who only wanted a quick cyberfuck.

I sat there afterwards grilling them for information, "Did 'licked my luscious pink lips' turn you on or would 'ran my tongue over my pouting pink lips leaving them glistening' have been better?" I was taking the new found information from reading online porn and watching porn video excerpts and turning that into 'descriptive text'. In Real Life, I was attempting dirty talking a bit, but it still embarrassed me and I found myself floundering around trying to find the right things to say and the courage to utter them. Before this, I was the usual moan, groan and "oh my god" type of sex person, interspersed with the occasional "ow" as my head bounced off the headboard. No more though, men in Second Life seemed to love it and I was determined to try it out in Real Life.

Halloween was rapidly approaching and I was looking around for a costume for a huge Real Life party I was going to. I loved my new jewelry in Second Life with the bells that tinkled every step I took. It disappointed me that I couldn't wear something in Real Life with bells on it everyday, but I think the other people in the office where I work would complain. Also, I was definitely didn't want to mimic the Second Life bells since they were attached to nipple clamps - that would be an amusing story to tell at work, "Yes, every time I jiggle my boobs, they ring because I have nipple clamps with bells on them." Not the picture of a modern professional woman, my advancement at the company instead of being on an upward tragectory would turn into more of a horizontal, couch-based career path.

I eventually hit upon a costume that was a rousing success. During my first couple of weeks in Second Life, I purchased a dark, tiger-striped cat suit that I loved. I had also purchased neko ears and a tail that went with it. The tail and ears were excellent, moving around on their own and picking up on key words as you typed. Those words would change your neko "mood" and suddenly the ears or tail would perk up and swish around depending on what you said. What sealed the idea was the realization that cats sometimes have bells on their collar, so all I needed was to go as a cat, wear a collar with a bell, and a tail that swished around. Simple as that.

Assembling the costume turned into an adventure itself. I already had a mostly opaque black catsuit covered in gold glitter I could wear. Needing the cat portions, i.e. ears, tail, and the collar, I went to the costume store. The ears at the store were good, also being black with glittery gold, but the tail, well, it just was a tiny little bit of limp fabric. No swishing around, no raised up and bobbling around over my head, in general it was a lousy cat tail. Second Life's potential was already corrupting me, "This is awful, it should be simple to throw together a simple tail and script it so it... oh... scripting... hrmm... animatronics... errr... gah... Real Life sucks."

I had hit a big, Real Life quandry, how to make a tail that stayed aloft and moved around. Thankfully, my father prepared me in life, while my mother taught me to sew and knit, my father taught me how to use tools and provided me with a little used tool box that I've always kept around for sentimental reasons. Mostly, I just get one of my Boy Toys to fix anything I need. Changing light bulbs, mowing lawns, carrying shopping packages, opening jars, and sex - the five things men are most useful for, although not necessarily in that order.

I manufacturered my own tail out of some stout wire and furry fabric - thereby pleasing both parents by using both wire cutters and needle and thread in the construction of the costume. Although, the uses I planned for that tail would not have pleased them anywhere near as much. I took an old, black, leather mini-skirt threaded the tail through a hole in the rump I made and I was finished with the ears, tail, and body suit. In a previous chapter I mentioned that I have 2" platform, 6" heel black patent leather hooker boots that I mostly only wear on Halloweeen. This was Halloween and I was planning on wearing them.

Next came the collar and bells. The costume store didn't have a decent looking collar, so I decided I had to go to a pet store to get one. I went off to the pet store to purchase a collar for my neck, eventually finding the cutest pink collar that would be perfect. But, I realized that I had no idea if the collar would fit. Glancing around I began to try on various sized collars to see which ones fit. At any second I was afraid someone would walk up behind me and ask me what I was doing. But being the comsummate shopper that I am, I had to make certain it both fit and looked good. I tried on collar after collar, looking in the mirror I carry in my purse to see how it looked and wishing there was a bigger mirror right there in the store to model in front of. Although, I bet that the demand for mirrors so that the dogs and cats can see how they look in their new collars is generally pretty low. That was one of the more strange moments in my life, standing in the middle of a big petstore, trying on collars and hoping no one noticed.

Finally, I found a collar that fit perfect and looked just righ, I turned to go purchase my illicit goods when I thought about the matching leash on the hook next to it and the line, "I'm just a naughty little kitty that has run away from my owner, would you be my owner?" popped into my head. I giggled as I mentally saw the look on my date's face when I would say that to him, so I grabbed the matching leash and went to assemble my costume.

The final state of the costume was a black catsuit with gold glitter all over it, a black leather mini-skirt, the aforementioned hooker boots, black cat ears, a black cat tail long enough to curve up higher than my head and wobble around adorably on its own, and a pink collar with a big bell and a leash dangling from it. I topped it off with pink bows on wrists and tail adorned with more bells and long pink ribbons streaming from them.

Later, while walking down the street, if people didn't initially notice me, the bells drew their attention and the rest of the costume held it. At the party, my tail wobbled around, tapping people on the shoulder and meeting them all on it's own. Everyone was having a fun time with my costume, most of all me. I'd never dressed as a Real Life neko before and it was incredibly fun having a tail and leash to play with, flirt with, and in general draw too much attention to myself with. My Boy Toy was mesmerized the whole time and I'm certain I saw him staring and drooling on more than one occasion. I had a blast.

This exhibitionist streak continued throughout the evening and it prepared me for my first major Real Life foray into dirty talk during the after-party sex that night. As the party wore on, I kept walking near my date and whispering dirty little phrases in his ear. Tempting him, teasing him, and giving him a prelude as to the wild, uninhibited sex to come later that evening. I used tried and tested lines that I'd critiqued and honed with my impromptu Second Life focus groups. He didn't stand a chance and couldn't wait to leave the party all night, but I kept him in suspense the entire party.

When we did leave, he couldn't keep his hands off of me and when we made it to the car he wasn't prepared to wait for the drive, so I had sex in a car for the first time since I had my own apartment. I didn't even take off the costume, there was no need, it was a crotchless catsuit. Yes, I was utterly shameless. We ended up doing it 'kitty style' because the tail made it difficult for any other position, all the while I was using more and more of my well-practiced cybersex phrases to drive him even more mad with lust. By the end that was some of the most vigorous and empassioned sex I'd had in a while, all due to a little bit of inspiration from a Second Life neko costume and cybersex.

One of my favorite pop-culture references to dirty talk comes from Friends, where Ross is learning how to dirty talk.

Ross: I was the James Michener of dirty talk. It was the most elaborate filth you have ever heard. I mean, there were different characters, plot lines, themes, a motif... at one point there were villagers.
Joey: Whoa! And the... uh-huh?
Ross: Well, you know, by the time we'd finished with all the dirty talk, it was kinda late, and we were both kind of exhausted, so...
Joey: cuddled.
Ross: Yeah, which was nice.

I prefer to think of myself more like Shakespeare - a true artist, rather than the over-wordy Michener. Which is also why we had time to get to the actual sex. But the 'villagers' line still makes me giggle and a number of times while at the party that 'villagers' line would pop into my head and I would giggle as I thought about more and more creative things to tease my boy toy with.

Chapter 9 : An Unexpected Audience While Defiling An Altar

Happy Blogiversary To Me!

Happy Blogiversary To Me! Happy Blogiversary To Me! Happy Blogiversary Dear Tiessa, Happy Blogiversary To Me! You look like a Bimbo and you act like one too!

Today, March 6th, is the one year blogiversary of me getting first post to this blog and essentially dominating it's content since then. I bet you've been anticipating this as much as I have and planned a huge surprise party for me with cake, balloons, and male strippers. Plus, plenty of other presents, of course. Yay! Send in the strippers and let me start to pig out on cake, ice cream, and, well, strippers... ;)

I have a present for all of you out there who have read my blog throughout this past year, a big thank you for showing such good taste. Or whatever excuse you want to give for why you read my blog...

My next post will also mark the 100th post to the blog, in addition to being my present to you for being such great readers. A nice milestone at a perfect juncture. I'm bursting at the seams to give you your present, so, without further adieu, I give you the next chapter in the Mistress Strangelove series...

Wednesday, March 5, 2008

Five Sentences From Page 123 Book Meme

Lillie Yifu has an interesting book meme on her blog. The rules are fairly straight-forward:

1. Pick up the nearest book (of at least 123 pages).
2. Open the book to page 123.
3. Find the fifth sentence.
4. Post the next three sentences.
5. Tag five people.

I wasn't tagged, but this is an interesting meme to me, so here goes. Besides, it gives me an opportunity to raise the reading level of my blog.

Find a book of at least 123 pages.
Hmm, "Go Dog Go!", not enough pages, although I wish there was a sequel, it's one of my favorite books. Let's try the next one. "Dick and Jane." Not enough pages, but I have to remember to finish that adventure novel, I had just made it to the good part where Dick and Jane were running and I want to find out where they were running to. Next book (seriously ;)

Post five sentences after sentence five from page 123.
Paradise Lost, by John Milton

Terrestrial Heaven, danced round by other Heavens
That shine, yet bear their bright officious lamps,
Light above light, for thee alone, as seems,
In thee concentring all their precious beams
Of sacred influence! As God in Heaven
Is center, yet extends to all; so thou,
Centring, receivest from all those orbs: in thee,
Not in themselves, all their known virtue appears
Productive in herb, plant, and nobler birth
Of creatures animate with gradual life
Of growth, sense, reason, all summed up in Man.
With what delight could I have walked thee round,
If I could joy in aught, sweet interchange
Of hill, and valley, rivers, woods, and plains,
Now land, now sea and shores with forest crowned,
Rocks, dens, and caves! But I in none of these
Find place or refuge; and the more I see
Pleasures about me, so much more I feel
Torment within me, as from the hateful siege
Of contraries: all good to me becomes
Bane, and in Heaven much worse would be my state.
But neither here seek I, no nor in Heaven
To dwell, unless by mastering Heaven's Supreme;
Nor hope to be myself less miserable
By what I seek, but others to make such
As I, though thereby worse to me redound:
For only in destroying I find ease
To my relentless thoughts; and, him destroyed,
Or won to what may work his utter loss,
For whom all this was made, all this will soon
Follow, as to him linked in weal or woe;
In woe then; that destruction wide may range:
To me shall be the glory sole among
The infernal Powers, in one day to have marred
What he, Almighty styled, six nights and days
Continued making; and who knows how long
Before had been contriving?

Good old John, he loves the run-on sentences. It is not exactly my favorite passage from Paradise Lost. Also, I am reading it online, which made finding page 123 a problem, but I pasted it into a work processor and went with the result.

By the way, "Go Dog Go" is one of my favorite books - I remember it fondly from my childhood; reading it over and over and looking at the pictures.